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Thread: Iceman and Gbagok Present: The Slave City

  1. #51
    Heroic Designer SUPERHEMANMIKE's Avatar
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    Very, very good work. The writing and the art are top notch.
    Extremely Professional. You two should be very proud of yourselves.
    I believe your stories deserve their own special spot on He-Man.Org.
    SUPERHEMANMIKE

    "It tasted good..." - Gwildor

  2. #52
    Heroic Warrior Cheshire Moon's Avatar
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    Awesome, love how all my favorite mini-comics keep sneaking in... King Thales though is suspiciously Bravestarr-esque (not that I'm complaining)
    Last edited by Cheshire Moon; November 11, 2005 at 04:58am.

  3. #53
    Heroic Warrior Orko's Hat's Avatar
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    I just about pee'ed in my furry shorts reading this. The art is FANTASTIC! The story is FANTASTIC! Everything is just FANTASTIC.

    With permission, can I use either Teela or the Sorceress as a avatar head shot? Wow!

    I fail to find the words to truly express how awesome this is!

  4. #54
    Rainbow Warrior Irian's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by gbagok
    This has to be the best hybrid between cartoon and action figure appearence for Man-At-Arms ever done on these boards. It's absoultely... WOW!

  5. #55
    Heroic Warrior Prime's Avatar
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    Wow...You guys are really truckin' on this stuff. Maybe you two can continue the real cartoon...

  6. #56
    Heroic Warrior Blade's Avatar
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    Sweeeeeeeeet!!!!!!! A new story!!!!!
    "Proud owner of both Keldor and She-Ra thanks to He-Man.Org"

    Come on Mattel, bring back He-Man and the Masters of the Universe, Adora, She-Ra, and The Evil Horde!!!!!!!!

    Blade's MOTU Figure Need List:
    Snake Armor He-Man x3
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    FIGHT FOR YOUR RIGHT TO MOTU AND DON'T LET MOTU DIE!!!!!!!!

  7. #57
    Heroic Warrior Hordaks Henchman's Avatar
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    huhu

    jihaaaaaaaaaa

    it goes on and on. i love that new ZODAK looking like the new version of the classic one. great

    Hey mr. ICEMAN and mr. gbagok: CAN I TRANSLATE THAT STORY IN GERMAN TO PRESENT IT ON PLANETETERNIA.DE?????????

    OH PLEASE

  8. #58
    HAAAAAAAAAPPYYYYYYYY..... Prince Adam's Dad's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SUPERHEMANMIKE
    Very, very good work. The writing and the art are top notch.
    Extremely Professional. You two should be very proud of yourselves.
    I believe your stories deserve their own special spot on He-Man.Org.
    Seriously- this needs to be done...
    Got Man-E-Faces, Give 'em Whiplash when I Battle-Cats

  9. #59
    Heroic Warrior gbagok's Avatar
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    The beginning of Chapter Four has been slightly altered--I left out a paragraph and for that I apologize.

    But on with the story:

    Chapter Five: The Power of Point Dread

    In the Slave Pits of Targa once again, He-Man frees Lizard Man from his chains and tells him and Garn what he has learned from Balina. Garn at first appears unmoved, but he soon becomes angry. “She offered you Targa itself, and you turned her away? What kind of man are you?”

    “The kind who wants to know who he truly is, Garn. Or do you think only chains make a slave?”
    “You are chained to the past,” says Garn angrily. “What is lost cannot be recovered, and you’ve let a chance to save yourself—and others—slip from your grasp in pursuit of it.”

    “Perhaps it is not too late to accept,” Lizard Man suggests. “She says she does not care about keeping slaves. Perhaps she means what she says and will let you end the slavery. Perhaps then you can still ask Lodar for his help?” He-Man considers the suggestion, but then one of Lodar’s Kobolds comes to him and informs him in a fell, crackling voice, that Lodar is ready to see him.

    Meanwhile, Teela and the Oberon set out with Dakkon to the peak of the mystical Point Dread. As she leaves the city, Teela is stopped by Thales, who whispers to her. “In case the Enforcers refuse, it is important that someone who speaks for Dakkon knows his full story. He is not my true son.
    He is the son of the elder of the two brothers, who fore sought his life as an Enforcer to live among us for a time. He married my sister Rhea, but unlike him, she was mortal and became ill. She died bearing her child, and consumed by grief, and guild for failing to protect her as an Enforcer, Dakkon’s father returned to his place among the Cosmos and left Dakkon in my care. Not even Dakkon knows this secret I am entrusting with you, and he must not know until his father chooses the time.”
    Teela promises to keep the secret.

    On the way to the mountain peak, Sala-Man-Dor admits he did not expect so much perseverance from the humans. “My people regenerate their severed limbs and our wounds heal faster than yours. All this made me believe you were just as afraid of the outside and unknown as we are. I am pleased to say I was wrong about you.”

    Suddenly a blood-chilling war cry comes from the cliffs above and they look to see the murderous Kobolds crawling down toward them. Above the Kobolds are Kobra Kahn and Tarrak. “Traitor,” cries Rana, but Tarrak clucks his tongue. “I could be persuaded to spare you, princess Rana. My allies in Targa have promised me the kingdom, and more for my allegiance. Immortality itself awaits us when they find the legendary Spring beneath Targa.”


    “Fool! The spring beneath Targa never existed!”

    “So your father wants us to believe. He’d rather play sycophant to the Enforcers and their narrow dogma than make himself and his people truly great! But Geldor and Balina have discovered evidence that the spring is real. They’re digging for it even now! They are the future, Rana.”

    “And what are they promising your Snake Men friends,” Teela demands, but Tarrak ignores her and demands their surrender. Teela and Rana are about to surrender when a Targan air ship rises up from the valley. It levies it’s energy weapons at the Kobolds and sends them showering down the cliff. Tarrak and Kahn curse in vain and flee as the air ship hovers over the path. A debarking ramp extends, and out steps Princess Maran. She runs to Dakkon, tears of joy in her eyes. But Dakkon does not recognize her.
    Last edited by gbagok; August 31, 2012 at 05:33pm.

  10. #60
    Heroic Warrior gbagok's Avatar
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    Teela and Rana explain what has happened to her, and Maran reveals that she too has learned of the plot in Targa. “My father’s illness began when he started to question Balina and Geldor’s interest in the catacombs beneath Targa. When I learned Dakkon had disappeared, I chose to listen in on them. They’re planning to take over all Eternia with the soldiers they are breeding. They’re using a strange substance they’ve found in the catacombs. It is not the Liquid of Life, but has transformed many of our gladiators into monsters.”
    “They must have found a pool of the Enemy’s blood,” says Rana finally. “They’ve confused it with the Liquid of Life! They think if they dig they’ll find more!” Teela nods, recalling again that He-Man might also have amnesia and realizing that the Enforcers may well be their only hope.

    High above the valley, Teela and the others reach the mysterious Point Dread. Once there they find a hidden laboratory, where they find a huge holographic display. As they enter, the lights grow bright and the form of Zeelar appears inside. Rana smiles. “It is the younger brother…Oberon!”
    “Oberon?” Teela repeats in surprise. “But this is Zeelar! If he is Oberon, then his brother Targa must have been—“
    “Zodak,” says a commanding voice from above.

    Zodak himself appears, surrounded in mystical light. “You have done well, my children. You return to us together. Oberon, Targa, and Repton—united as allies.”
    “But, the Reptons weren’t part of the old legend,” says Teela.
    “But they were, Teela. They were the creatures of the valley. They were forever changed by the Liquid of Life when its drops fell on this land.” All around Zodak, holographic representations of other Enforcers appear. “We have waited for these sects to cooperate for thousands of years. Now at last it has come to be.”
    “But it’s not,” Teela objects, “Geldor and Balina have taken over Targa. They’re breeding an army with the blood of the Enemy! The Snake Men are helping them and He-Man’s memory is gone just like Dakkon’s! We need your help!”
    Zodak looks to the other Enforcers, and after a brief hesitation says “No, Teela. This is not my task.”

    “But Targa will be destroyed without your help,” cries Maran. “Even now Geldor and Balina are plotting to kill my father and overrun Eternia with the help of Lodar and his slaves!”
    “Lodar?” The Enforcers say together, and look to each other in shock. “This cannot be. Lodar was killed thousands of years ago by Zodac. Lodar was the Enforcer who fell to the side of Evil and came here to Eternia. His evil is match by only one.”
    “And,” says the Primary Enforcer, calming the others with his solemn voice, “He-Man must face him alone.”

    Back in Targa, He-Man enters the inner sanctum of Lodar, the Slave Master of Targa. “Come in, brave warrior,” says a cold voice from the darkness. He-Man sees the figure sitting in a chair, eyes burning like fire. “I have waited a long time to meet you, heir of Grayskull. Yes, I know who you are, even if you do not. I am Lodar, and I need your help to stop the evil that has ensnared all of Eternia…”

    What treachery is afoot? Will Teela and the others get back in time to save He-Man from Lodar’s lies? Or are the Cosmic Enforcers the real deceivers? Hope to find out in the next chapter: The Secret Liquid of Life!
    Last edited by gbagok; August 31, 2012 at 05:33pm.

  11. #61
    HAAAAAAAAAPPYYYYYYYY..... Prince Adam's Dad's Avatar
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    I love the "Green Lantern"- styled Cosmic Enforcers!

    Where is Beta-Ray Zodak?
    Got Man-E-Faces, Give 'em Whiplash when I Battle-Cats

  12. #62
    Heroic Warrior Dex-Gar's Avatar
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    I love Zodak's origin! Perfect! I love the council too.

    And you brought in Point Dread! Talon Fighter on the way?

    You guys have surpassed Anwat Gar! Top notch design work (great incorporation of cultural references)! Concise read too.

    I can't really find the words to express this one...Solid!

    And who is Lodar?...Strong Arm? Spikor?...I can't wait to see what is in store next!
    Last edited by Dex-Gar; November 11, 2005 at 02:37pm.
    Artists whose work you need to see to believe:
    gbagok----buffalo bill-man-----boo----Sllohcin
    Writers whose work is immortalized:
    catslyn-----eideann-----------divia

    my hat off to you ladies and gentleman, truly inspiring work.

  13. #63
    Heroic Warrior Orko's Magic Hat's Avatar
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    This is so brilliant,I just love how the characters are drawn and the brand new characters made are excellent, I'll learn how to draw some of then straight awa!

    I'll read the story later,it looks good.

  14. #64
    Heroic Warrior
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    WOW!!! I thought Anwat-Gar was awesome, but so far this is blowing that out of the water.

    I am in complete agreement that you should have your own section on this site. Absolutely brilliant stuff.

    You guys are getting good ..... scary good.

  15. #65
    Heroic Warrior gbagok's Avatar
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    Chapter Six: The Secret Liquid of Life

    While the Clamp Champ explores the lower corridors of the Targan arena, he discovers a hidden door that leads still lower beneath the city streets. As he descends, he hears the sounds of labor and cries of pain. He sneaks past two massive Gargons who guard the entry way, using his keen senses to anticipate and evade their scanning eyes. Beyond the entry, he finds the Slave Pits he’d heard about from Man-At-Arms. The tracking device Duncan gave him leads him to a drilling station, where Lizard Man is giving water to the slaves. A Kobold approaches him, having noticed that Lizard Man is not in chains like the other slaves, and begins to strike him for escaping. The Champ leaps to the rescue, lifting the creature up in his mighty clamp and hurtling him into the darkness. He breaks Lizard Man’s chain with his laser tool. “I see you’ve found the Slave Pits again, my friend. Don’t be afraid, Man-At-Arms sent me to find you.” Lizard Man thanks him and shows him the way to Lodar’s chamber to find He-Man. There, they overhear Lodar welcoming He-Man.

    “I’ve been watching you since they brought you here. Like myself, you hate the enslavement of the Reptons.”

    “You want them free as well? Then why are you the Master of Slaves? Who are you, Lodar?”

    Lodar sits back in the chair, eyes like narrow slits of flame. “The Targans were digging in these mines long before I was found. They discovered a substance long ago that they thought would bring them immortality, but instead created the creatures called Kobolds. They continue to think they will find a richer supply deeper in the catacombs, a source that will give them the everlasting life they desire. But instead they found me. I was asleep beneath Targa for eons. When they disturbed my resting place, they demanded I tell the Secret of the Liquid of Life, but alas I did not know it. In return for letting me life, I became their Master of Slaves, and have been a prisoner of Geldor and Balina ever since. The . . . substance they used to create the Kobolds is a narcotic they use now to control me.”

    “If what you say is true, then you also are a Slave of Targa, Lodar.” Lodar waits a moment, then gestures to his view screen. “Balina has already offered you a kingdom, has she not? Would you like to see what she really thinks of you?”

    In the monitor they see Balina and Drakka appear, conversing in private. Drakka is concerned by Balina’s offer to He-Man, afraid of an outsider becoming the King of Targa. “Do you think me witless, Drakka? If he kills Torgul, Geldor, and Randor for me, I can ascend to the throne of all Eternia unchallenged, and he will take the fall. And once we find the Liquid of Life, I will be the Eternal Queen of the Universe itself! Perhaps then, if the gladiator still pleases my eyes, I’ll keep him around to entertain me. But I will never give up half my power to an underling. Remember that Drakka, in case you have any designs of your own.”

    He-Man is not surprised. “If she seeks to overthrow this King Randor, then—“

    “She’ll trade one tyrant for another,” says Lodar quickly. “Who do you think has allowed this slavery to continue? Randor seized control of Eternia almost twenty cycles ago, and he permits the atrocities you have already witnessed.”

    “I have only your word of it,” says He-Man.

    “Then see it for yourself,” says Lodar, opening a door in the rear of the chamber. “This passage leads back to Stone Cold Mountain where you were found. You won’t remember it well, but it will show you what Randor has done.” He-Man is cautious, but leaves through the passage. Once alone, the Champ gets ready to capture Lodar when a strong hand grabs him from behind. A stranger in purple robes and metal mask appears, with two Gargons in tow. “These eavesdroppers were spying on you, Lodar,” he reports, but Lodar turns his chair towards them slowly.

    “Yes, I know. Nothing happens in Targa without my knowing.”

    “You are a deceiver,” growls Clamp Champ, struggling to get loose from the Gargon’s grip. The creature smashes his clamp against the wall and laughs with a deep rumbling growl. “The King and Queen—“
    “Are walking into a trap set by me,” Lodar says confidently. “Fortunately, Balina and Geldor are willing pawns in my game. And I have found other supporters in Oberon and among the Reptons as well. You Eternians are all such gullible creatures. Being surrounded by power greater than any in the universe has only made you thirst for more. This world is ripe to be plucked clean.”

    “You won’t be the first who’s tried to conquer Eternia, Lodar!”

    Lodar laughs. “Is that the extent of your vision? Fool, Eternia is a means unto an end. He-Man is the key. To have the undying loyalty of another…[i]that[i] is true power. Through him I will seize the greatest power on Eternia…and with that, I will control the Universe. This planet can crumble to dust then for all I care. My destiny is greater than any one world.” He turns away. “Shall I give you a demonstration? Suppose I showed you the truth behind this entire valley?” Another door in Lodar’s chamber opens at his command, and inside is an egg-shaped module. It opens and Lodar gestures the Gargon to bring Lizard Man to him. “Let us discover the true Secret of the Liquid of Life!”

    Back at Point Dread, the Enforcers commune together in private. Zodon, the leader, approaches Dakkon and says, “We have the means to undo your amnesia. It requires the smallest drop of the Liquid of Life. So small a dose will not make you immortal, but it will cure all ailments—that of your father Torgul as well,” he says to Maran, who is relieved and grateful.

    “The secret of the Liquid is easy…it must be given by another. It exist in all beings, it is life itself given a new form. But it is greatest within the Reptons. That is why they regenerate their limbs and heal their wounds so easily.” He turns to Sal and asks, “would you be willing to help Dakkon?” Sal agrees, and the Enforcers encircle him. Light surrounds them and Teela is momentarily blinded. When the light fades, Zodon produces a vial filled with a glowing blue liquid. He then applies the smallest drop to Dakkon’s eye, and a blue mist encircles him. When it is gone, he looks at Maran with full recognition and embraces her.


    “But this can help He-Man too,” says Teela, but Zodon will not let her do take it. “He-Man’s trial is his own.”

    “He-Man’s strength is his friends,” Teela insists. “What do you care how he passes this trial of yours, so long as he does? Is winning with our help any less a victory?”


    “She speaks truly,” says Zodak. Zodon still refuses, but the other Enforcers are less sure. Sal says to them, “The liquid you now have was given by me. I was willing to help these people—not just Dakkon. If the giver’s intent matters so much, then my desire to help He-Man should not be ignored.” The other Enforcers agree until finally Zodon allows them to take the vial. One by one the Enforcers vanish, until only Zodak remains.
    Last edited by gbagok; August 31, 2012 at 05:34pm.

  16. #66
    Heroic Warrior gbagok's Avatar
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    While Maran and Rana welcome Dakkon back, Teela talks to Zodak. “Dakkon is your son, isn’t he? Why don’t you tell him who you are?” “Because he too has a destiny that must unfold on its own. And because I love him and want him to live a better life than I could give him. As an adopted child yourself, you must know this. Would you trade the father you know and love for a parent you can never be with?”

    “No,” she says after a moment. “But I’d like at least to have the choice. Is keeping that from him really to help Dakkon, or to help you?”

    Zodak doesn’t answer, and instead changes the subject. “You have little time. King Randor and Queen Marlena are in danger and He-Man’s moment of decision is at hand. You must take Zodac’s old ship, the Talon Fighter. It will know when to come for you.” And then he too vanishes, leaving them alone. The majestic vessel of the Enforcers is shaped like a huge falcon.

    Its cockpit is large and spacious enough for multiple occupants, but it’s controls are alien and hard to understand. “Do you know how to fly such a craft,” Sal asks Teela. She groans. “This could be a problem.”

    Back in Lodar’s laboratory, the Slave Master reveals the function of his ominous machine. “I’ve only just completed this device from my own designs. You see, it simulates the Enforcers’ ability to create the Liquid of Life. Of course without a willing participant, the device is useless. But suppose I kill your friend with the Clamp, eh? What would you do to save him?” A gesture from Lodar is all the Gargon needs. He stabs the Champ, who moans in agony and crumples to the floor. Lizard Man cries out in protest, but Lodar forces him to watch. “My device can create the Liquid of Life to save your friend. But you have to enter the chamber willingly. What do you choose?” Clamp champ begs Lizard Man not to do as Lodar asks, but Lizard Man cannot let the Champ die. He crawls into the module and it closes around him, like an egg recovering its hatchling.

    Soon blue liquid fills the vats under the egg, and Lodar injects himself with the first dose. “AHAH! It has been too long since I felt this nourishment! I thank you, Man of Eternia. You’ve allowed me to test my machine and for that, I will honor my promise to the Repton.” He administers a tiny amount of the liquid to the Champ, whose stab wound vanishes. “Put him in the pits,” Lodar commands. He looks to his masked accomplice and hands him one of the vats. “This completes our bargain, I think. You have planted the evidence of the Eternian’s presence in the caves?”

    The masked one nods. “And we retrieve the weapon you asked for.” Clamp Champ gasps as the masked one hands Lodar the Sword of Power itself. “Excellent! You’ve done your part well. Take your payment and be gone. I have no more need of spies. When all is done, I will leave this world behind, and your agenda can have its way with Eternia.” The masked one nods and leaves.


    Meanwhile, He-Man has persuaded Garn to come with him out of the Slave Pits. Together they climb into the jungle wilderness outside at the foot of Cold Stone Mountain. “Does it look familiar to you,” Garn asks, and He-Man confesses a slight recollection of a great stone face gaping over a cave-like door. But smoke is rising from the mouth of Cold Stone Mountain, and inside they find a massacre.

    The Reptons inside are all dead, save for a few who hide in the darkness. King Pythos comes forth, badly beaten. “So you’ve returned to see your butchery, Man of Eternos?” He-Man is confused, but Pythos points to a staff embedded in the ground like a dagger. It waves the flag of Eternos. “I trusted you, and our people are all but destroyed because of it!”

    “Sire, I do not remember what part I played in this,” says He-Man regretfully, “But I swear I will avenge your people. Randor and Eternos will pay for the blood they've spilled today!”

    Will Lodar’s evil scheme succeed? Will Teela and the others save King Randor from He-Man himself?! All this and more in the thrilling conclusion, Chapter Seven: The Circos Eternia!
    Last edited by gbagok; November 11, 2005 at 10:31pm.

  17. #67
    Bearshow
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    Top notch stuff, guys!

    I really like the Cosmic Enforcers, and love your original Zodac. I wish the 4H one looked like that .

    Absolutely great designs on all the characters! You bring back a lot of the fun of comic art, much like the King himself, Jack Kirby!

    Lots of fun!

    Cheers!
    Bearshow!

  18. #68
    Heroic Warrior Hordaks Henchman's Avatar
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    story

    great. i will built all them enforceres as customs

  19. #69
    Heroic Warrior Ivotas's Avatar
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    Guys, everything in this story is top notch! Without trying to be talk negative about your previous work, but so far this story surpasses "The Return to Anwat-Gar" in every aspect. It literally owns it.

    Great work, really really great work! I salute to you.

    However if in your Zodac/Zodak/Zeelar/Dakon story somehow Strobo should be included then you will scare the hell out of me.

    Keep up the good work and please post more stuff soon.

  20. #70
    Tri-Solar Lord Oceanwalker's Avatar
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    Good story. Nice flow.

  21. #71
    Heroic Warrior maczero's Avatar
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    Amazing stuff, Gbagok and Ice!!!

    Along with an amazing story and awe inspiring character designs, I've finally got to see Gbagok take on mainstream characters such as MAA & the royal family. BTW, Gbagok since you've completed the royal family, MAA and Teela, your next tour of Eternia should be the Palace. All you need at this point are the royal guard and the grunt soldiers. After that, I would suggest the Cosmic Enforcers as the next tour stop.

  22. #72
    Impin' Ain't Easy! DreamTripper's Avatar
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    This stuff is great... Are Return to AG and Slave City the only ones you've done? I think that if the .Org does not supply a spot on the main page for this, then there should be a spot for the stories at the Legends site.

    And where can I find all of the Tours?

    Support Bili the Droid
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    CANNON-a mounted gun for firing heavy projectiles; a gun, howitzer, or mortar.

    Imp is here!
    I will change my avatar as soon as Songster is made in MOTUC

  23. #73
    Heroic Warrior Causelessdemon's Avatar
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    You guys have really done amazing work here... it's like getting the cartoon back almost... Sure the pictures don't move... but the writing and the imagery have kept my imagination going constant so that it does truly seem like it's in motion anyhow...

  24. #74
    It says ICEMAN oICEMANo's Avatar
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    Thanks for the kind words everyone! I was wondering how this story would hold against The Return to Anwat Gar. Thanks for the continued suppport.
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  25. #75
    That's my BOY! TRAPPER's Avatar
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    really thank you guys for putting this together!!!!

    Is it time to start making the LODAR custom yet??????

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