Easily the worst of the 3 Transformers films. I also want my two and half hours back. Worst film of the year so far for me. I can't believe they dumped Megan Fox for that useless excuse for an actress.
I thought the movie was awesome, but there were a few things that irritated me about it;
1.) No background on how Megatron went from a Jet Fighter in the first two to an 18 Wheeler in DOTM, and how he wasn't in the movie very much.
2.) The ending seemed to come outta nowhere and it happened 5 minutes before the movie ended.
But that's about it, other than that I loved it!!!!....But I think the first one was still the best one.
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Easily the worst of the 3 Transformers films. I also want my two and half hours back. Worst film of the year so far for me. I can't believe they dumped Megan Fox for that useless excuse for an actress.
"There's only one Master of the Universe and it's He-Man." - Stephen Colbert
"The heart has its reasons of which reason knows nothing." - Blaise Pascal
Don't worry film haters it will get baried this weekend by Alan Rickmans awesomeness
i think the first one is the best ,although this is not so good
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I wasn't going to see this movie, and therefore would reserve judgement until the day I didn't pay to see it, but some friends dragged me out to it. While Shia Lebouf was his usual charming self, and I could bring myself to watch his next flick, if its sans MB, this movie was a piece of garbage. All of Bumbleebee's screen time was a fanboys delight, he was about the only CGI investment that worked.
There were no ******bots or Slutbots this time. However Michael Bay's amazing, original and creative vision of WTFormers served us his usual turd bowl of squiggly, droopy faced, fowl mouthed little twirpbots, who seem to appeal to the women in the audience more than anyone. "Oh he's so cute and silly!", and serve no purpose other than making funny noises and having cheesey one liners, but in boring, predictable fashion, save the day at the end. "Silly wobot fall all way down! Go boom! Ha ha ha!"
The way he shot is new lipo-lipped starlet was so gratuitous, with more upskirt shots than a cheap softcore appealed to the 'dudes' in the audience. "Aww dude! That's hot! Dude!" I think there was a Predatorbot there too. The Transformers designs had been slowly morphing into Matrixesque machines, and in this movie, the transformation was complete.
The half baked parents were there, with their usual swill of 'hip' life advice. The old batch of utterly laughable, painful to watch, one dimensional, useless human characters were there to fill the space between scenes. That turdpile of CGI metal they called Starscream, drooled alot. That bizarre thing they called Shockwave made alot of scary noises. Lazerbeak was a lackluster twist of metal and bad lines. Yes, Laserbeak can talk between squawking, though what he has to say is nothing you want to hear.
It was the worst out of the bayverse *** movies. It was the worst pile of crap movie I've seen this year. I would have walked out and got my money back, but I had to see just how far down into the sludge he would pull it. This guy and everyone that didn't slap him, needs a swift backhand across the face. I had to pretend this movie was some other dish of sci-fi cusTURD, just so I could choke it down. I was first out of the theater, and anyone who didn't look like a complete idiot hopped up on Redbull, wearing a TF tee with fingers soaked in butter, and wasn't some tribal tattooed little punk still yaking about what they would do with Boobs McLips if they had her for a night stated clearly, "Yeah, it sucked."
I am a fan of G1 TF yes, and of some of the other TF universes,though I am more a fan of good movies. This was in no way either. Worst movie ever. I hate Michael Bay. I'm going to go see the new HP, I'm going to love it, and that will be it for my summer blockbusters this year.
1 out of 10 (1 for Shia, because he did Sam well, and looked the part, he would have scored a 2 had he the balls to stand up, be a real hero, and stop MB from ruining this movie)
PS: Have you ever watched Blue Mountain State? BMS is Spike TV's smutty, foul college jock comedy series, centering around a football team and the chicks they bang, inspired by such 80s frat flicks such as Animal House. I watch it when I want to completely turn off my brain, and be stupid. After watching the series, I can see now where MB pulls his inspiration from. MBs Transformers watches like 3 episodes of BMS, with giant CGI robots painted in the background. God I hate this man.
Last edited by Sky Breaker; July 16, 2011 at 11:40am.
Question...
How is Dark Of The Moon worse than Revenge Of The Fallen?
The second movie had even more craziness than the first or third movies:
Devastator's balls
Humping dogs
Wheelie Humping Mikaela's leg
Sam's mom in alot of scenes
Simmon's underwear
Skids and Mudflap
Autobot Heaven
Jetfire
The guy with the bad teeth
Leo, Sam's roommate
And that's the super bad stuff.
Last edited by MegaGearMax; July 16, 2011 at 09:02pm.
The first movie had:
"Peeing" robots
Human/human/robot threesomes
Sam's mom talking about his "alone time"
A supposedly "great" Autobot leader stumbling around a flowerbed like a hyperactive kid all while exclaiming an already passe phrase like "my bad"
A "jive talking" Autobot who was the only Autobot casualty
Last edited by Krueger; July 17, 2011 at 03:31pm.
There was a lot I didn't like in the first movie. I listed the things that either I or someone else might find objectionable. I also haven't seen the movie since it was in the theater so I'm sure I'm forgetting things.
I don't think there was anything sinister behind Jar Jar Binks or the 2 robots in ROTF. It didn't stop people from complaining about them. MGM used those 2 as a reason why the first sequel was bad so I countered with something I found similar.
No, the recipe calls for more. Lets consult chef MegaGearMax.
Add this to the pot of crap. Simmer for 2 hours, gently stirring. Quickly serve up big bowl of turds with Coke or Dr. Pepper.
Finish with Dark of The Moon if your gut wall hasn't completely rotted out...
The movies always have "offensive" robots, so I included them. Besides, the twins screentime compared to Arcee, Jolt or Sideswipe was the subject of alot of hate in TF2. I think people were actually disappointed that the Wreckers had Scottish accents.
To some fans it is. Usually such disdain comes from Bayhaters or Geewunners, but no matter how awesome the battles or special effects are, some casual fans are taken out of the movie by Bay's bizarre sense of humor. I've found that some people have a tendency to overexaggerate how bad Bay's movies are.
Do people remember the awesome fight in the forest between Optimus, Megatron, Starscream and Grindor? No, they remember the gag with Devastator's balls.
Last edited by MegaGearMax; July 17, 2011 at 03:11pm.
I know that the twins were accused of sounding "black", but I've heard plenty of white people sound the same way. Even if they were voiced by black people, how is it any different than what Larry The Cable Guy does. I think it was just that they were stupid robots and not that they were stupid black robots.
I loved Bay's first 3 movies and enjoyed the 2 after that. I'm definitely not a hater. As for being a G1 fan, I grew up with the Transformers, but would not classify myself as a fan. I can't even name most of the "popular" characters. My problem, besides juvenile humor, was that not only could you not tell most of the Decepticons apart in any of the movies, the so called "awesome" battles were a bunch of scrap metal twisting through the air like members of Circus De Soleil. Not only did it look ridiculous, I couldn't tell who or what I was even looking at. It might as well have been some footage from a General Motors factory during a tornado.
Btw, why did the Transformers feel the need to spin whenever they jumped? That wasn't anymore helpful in a fight than when gansters turn their guns sideways in a John Woo movie. At least that kinda looks cool imo.
I prefer to look at the films, or any film for that matter, as a complete piece and judge it as a film. All the negative reviews that have been posted by professional critics for all three films don’t seem to have a problem with the comic relief. It seems that the dislike of the comical aspects is more of a fan thing.
As MegaGearMax said, some fans would rather choose to focus on a split second visual gag of Devastator's "balls", rather than the pure adrenaline fuelled forest fight scene. I'm willing to overlook one second of fluff for three minutes of amazingly well done action.
The Transformers films all have problems; I'm not a blind "gusher", and particularly the second one. The comic relief, however, is the least of them, IMO. I have more of a problem with the ridiculously long running times (edit the damn thing!), the action with the robots being framed quite poorly (particularly in the first film) and too confusing narratives marred by Michael Bay's frenetic style of directing. Those are of more importance, IMO.
I think fans can sometimes be a bit too prudish.
Last edited by Krueger; July 17, 2011 at 03:41pm.
Well, for your sake and your fellow fans who aren't prudes, I hope if we ever get a new MOTU movie, Orko pees on people, Battle Cat humps people's legs, and Megator's balls are swinging for all to gaze upon. That will make it a blockbuster for sure. I'll stay at home and watch my G-Rated Secret Of The Sword fully clothed in my feety pajamas right after I say my bedtime prayers.
But that's the worst of it...which it's critics focus on. Not the best, which was why those films were so successful in the first place. Some people always seem to forget that ROTF had some great action scenes. People go to those movies to see giant robots duking it out and blowing things up. For viewers to support the movies two other times, must mean that the Bay humor scenes have little effect on their experiences as a whole.
Bay wanted the robots not to seem slow because they were so big. He wanted to show that Transformers had grace and speed.
Y'know what drove me insane about the 1st 2 films, and no not just the length (especially the 2nd one) but the uninspired and utterly lame soundtrack. In the first one we were forced once again to hear another Kill Bill nod when Bumble Bee unveils his updated car model after Mikaela proclaimed her hatred of classic cars.
Then in the second one it went WAY too far with how many time we had to listen to that tone-deaf Green Day song about patriotism or whatever way more times then anyone would like to, and I used to be a fan of them in the 90s before they started to suck after Nimrod. I remember MB doing the same crap in Armageddon where we had to hear that same Aerosmith song over and over just because his daughter was in the movie.
And since I'm not gonna see it can someone confirm a few things for me?
Like do they make us listen to another Linkin Park song ad the end credits? Y'know just because they have giant anime robots all over their album art means they have to be in a movie about giant robots.
And do they even explain Mikaela's absence in the movie(not that I really care), or is it just as simple as she dumped him for Wheelie, oh that would be funny?
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