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Thread: Does anyone else find the Battle Bones artwork really unsettling?

  1. #1
    Heroic Warrior
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    Does anyone else find the Battle Bones artwork really unsettling?

    The one where everyone's lined up in their toy poses. It makes me really uncomfortable for some reason. Idk if it's because it's a departure from the typical kinetic artwork we see, or if it's because I've never actually owned any vintage figures (I'm pretty young). But like, it almost feels like they're taxidermied or something.

  2. #2
    Heroic Warrior
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    I went back and looked at the artwork. No, I don’t personally find it disturbing. I guess it’s just one of those things. Personally, I find the original Sunbow Transformers theme song to get progressively more disturbing or ominous with each season of the show. Also someone did a face-swap photoshop of Bert and Ernie and posted it somewhere online... creepiest thing ever lol.

  3. #3
    Heroic Warrior Night Stalker's Avatar
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    Someone pointed out once that on the box art, Whiplash has his right hand on the carrying handle, and he's looking into the "camera" with a shocked look, as if he has just realized he's an action figure in some kid's collection and has no existence outside of that imaginary play world.

    I can't unsee this now anytime I look at the box. Whiplash knows he's a glitch in the matrix and is now woke.
    Most wanted Origins figures: Mighty Spector, Fisto's Cousin's Babysitter, and Mer-Man's Seventh Grade Crush.

  4. #4
    Court Magician rank_and_vile's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Night Stalker View Post
    Someone pointed out once that on the box art, Whiplash has his right hand on the carrying handle, and he's looking into the "camera" with a shocked look, as if he has just realized he's an action figure in some kid's collection and has no existence outside of that imaginary play world.
    I dunno. I just looked at a really high res scan and I think Whiplash looks like he's looking up. SKELETOR, on the other hand, looks like he's looking out and thinking, "Why me?" He's very distressed. Which I suppose isn't terribly inaccurate.

  5. #5
    Heroic Warrior Lokus's Avatar
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    I personally think its one of the least scary box art .

    Now BattleCat boxart . Thats a scary nightmare monster . Even HeMan seem less than comfortable riding him .

  6. #6
    Color'licious! JVS3's Avatar
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    If you want to go for box art that's a bit weird, Sagitar has the "chummiest" artwork there is. But it makes me smile. I don't find any of the artwork for any of the packaging unsettling.
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  7. #7
    Court Magician rank_and_vile's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by JVS3 View Post
    If you want to go for box art that's a bit weird, Sagitar has the "chummiest" artwork there is. But it makes me smile. I don't find any of the artwork for any of the packaging unsettling.
    I had no idea what that was until I looked it up. Pretty sure I've seen less homoerotic covers on actual gay porn!

  8. #8
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    I ship it.

  9. #9
    Heroic Warrior Ninja Orko's Avatar
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    I like how the heroes are on one side and the villains are on the other. That would be one awkward ride.
    This message has been Orko Approved

  10. #10
    Heroic Warrior miscus555's Avatar
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    in Eternia, do you think Battle bones was even worth riding? compared to the other rides available, he's probably slow
    LOOKING for these MOTU Full Cardbacks:
    -Skeletor w/"original" promo on front
    -Man E Faces w/ "extra weapons" promo on front
    -Trap Jaw w/o Ring Promo on front & newer figures pictured on back
    -Tri Klops w/o Ring Promo on front & newer figures pictured on back
    & Mantisaur Empty Box (USA) Version

  11. #11
    Heroic Warrior Night Stalker's Avatar
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    I thought the same thing back in the day. My dad pointed out that they sent us off to school in a big bus governed at 35mph, as opposed to individual race cars. So I looked at it as an economical ground troop transport that could hold weapons in its mouth.

    If we're talking about impractical battle vehicles, the Dragon Walker makes less sense than Battle Bones, IMO. Imagine being a Palace Guard on the battlefield, waiting on reinforcements.

    "Where's He-Man?"

    "Oh, he was just leaving the palace when I spoke with him. He took the Dragon Walker, so he'll probably be here tomorrow. Let's hope we can fight off Skeletor's forces for the next 22 hours."

    "But the palace is only, like, a half a mile behind us."

    "Yeah, but have you ever driven a Dragon Walker? It just kind of goes wherever. You have to keep pulling it back and starting over again hoping it will move in a straight line."

    "Then why would he choose that as opposed to running? Or, I don't know, even walking? You telling me the most powerful man in the universe can't walk a half a mile?"

    "Here we go again."

    "I mean, he's got all these other vehicles. Not to mention, there's that giant cat he rides around on. Like, why even would you walk into a garage with a Battle Ram, Attack Trak, Wind Raiders, all that, and look at this giant piece of crap that goes like one mile per day and can't move in a straight line and go 'yup, that's the one.' I just don't get it."

    "Well, like, if he has to cross over a canyon, he can do that in the Dragon Walker."

    "So you're saying that in the off chance he comes across a narrow, eight foot wide canyon, the Dragon Walker is a better choice than, say... I dunno, a Wind Raider that can fly over it?"

    "Look, I'm not defending the guy. I'm just saying that not everything on Eternia has to make sense. A blue, muscular talking skeleton with a salivating dragon chained to his back just stabbed me in the leg. Does that make sense?"

    "I'm just saying. I don't know what Man At Arms was smoking when he came up with the Dragon Walker. It just seems stupid. Did he get some sort of kickback from the Randorian government for making a brutally inefficient vehicle?"

    "There you go with your conspiracy theories again."

    "Bruh. Webstor didn't hang himself. Come on. Dude's a freaking spider. Have you ever heard of a spider hanging himself with his own web?"

    "Just stop. Please."

    "I'm just saying."
    Most wanted Origins figures: Mighty Spector, Fisto's Cousin's Babysitter, and Mer-Man's Seventh Grade Crush.

  12. #12
    Heroic MI-6 Agent He-Manis007's Avatar
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    That is some decent He-Comedy!
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  13. #13
    Heroic Warrior Rioblast's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Night Stalker View Post
    I thought the same thing back in the day. My dad pointed out that they sent us off to school in a big bus governed at 35mph, as opposed to individual race cars. So I looked at it as an economical ground troop transport that could hold weapons in its mouth.

    If we're talking about impractical battle vehicles, the Dragon Walker makes less sense than Battle Bones, IMO. Imagine being a Palace Guard on the battlefield, waiting on reinforcements.

    "Where's He-Man?"

    "Oh, he was just leaving the palace when I spoke with him. He took the Dragon Walker, so he'll probably be here tomorrow. Let's hope we can fight off Skeletor's forces for the next 22 hours."

    "But the palace is only, like, a half a mile behind us."

    "Yeah, but have you ever driven a Dragon Walker? It just kind of goes wherever. You have to keep pulling it back and starting over again hoping it will move in a straight line."

    "Then why would he choose that as opposed to running? Or, I don't know, even walking? You telling me the most powerful man in the universe can't walk a half a mile?"

    "Here we go again."

    "I mean, he's got all these other vehicles. Not to mention, there's that giant cat he rides around on. Like, why even would you walk into a garage with a Battle Ram, Attack Trak, Wind Raiders, all that, and look at this giant piece of crap that goes like one mile per day and can't move in a straight line and go 'yup, that's the one.' I just don't get it."

    "Well, like, if he has to cross over a canyon, he can do that in the Dragon Walker."

    "So you're saying that in the off chance he comes across a narrow, eight foot wide canyon, the Dragon Walker is a better choice than, say... I dunno, a Wind Raider that can fly over it?"

    "Look, I'm not defending the guy. I'm just saying that not everything on Eternia has to make sense. A blue, muscular talking skeleton with a salivating dragon chained to his back just stabbed me in the leg. Does that make sense?"

    "I'm just saying. I don't know what Man At Arms was smoking when he came up with the Dragon Walker. It just seems stupid. Did he get some sort of kickback from the Randorian government for making a brutally inefficient vehicle?"

    "There you go with your conspiracy theories again."

    "Bruh. Webstor didn't hang himself. Come on. Dude's a freaking spider. Have you ever heard of a spider hanging himself with his own web?"

    "Just stop. Please."

    "I'm just saying."
    "If it ain't broke, don't fix it!"

  14. #14
    Heroic Warrior motogp_fanatic's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by miscus555 View Post
    in Eternia, do you think Battle bones was even worth riding? compared to the other rides available, he's probably slow
    I think this is a good example of where the Battle Bones is very much useful, less silly and more awesome.

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  15. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ninja Orko View Post
    I like how the heroes are on one side and the villains are on the other. That would be one awkward ride.
    Better to segregate them. Imagine if Skeletor was seated behind He-Man, flicking his ears and putting his knee into He-Man's back the whole trip. Man-at-Arms would have to be like, "Don't make me pull these bones over!"

    - - - Updated - - -

    Quote Originally Posted by rank_and_vile View Post
    I dunno. I just looked at a really high res scan and I think Whiplash looks like he's looking up. SKELETOR, on the other hand, looks like he's looking out and thinking, "Why me?" He's very distressed. Which I suppose isn't terribly inaccurate.
    Dude! Whiplash is having a full on Buzz Lightyear moment. You've never experienced existential horror until you're strapped onto the back of a troop carrier alongside all your allies and enemies, and you've just discovered the giant handle.

    battle-bones-main-1.jpg

  16. #16
    Heroic Warrior Lokus's Avatar
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    That Battle Bones always seemed like a very uncomfortable ride . That mini comic where dragon blaster skeletor summons Battlebones , gasses the heroes and attaches them onto BB like a prisoner transport vehicle kinda made more sense to me .

    In poor old Dragon walkers defence . That was the only one of two toys that moved on their own steam .
    If you want a real world translation , it's speed is 100 percent faster than battle cat .

  17. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by rank_and_vile View Post
    I had no idea what that was until I looked it up. Pretty sure I've seen less homoerotic covers on actual gay porn!
    It's amazing. No wonder Sagitar was one of my favourites as a kid. "Stands up for four-fisted action!"
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  18. #18
    Outlaw Preacher Dave-Man's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lokus View Post
    I personally think its one of the least scary box art .

    Now BattleCat boxart . Thats a scary nightmare monster . Even HeMan seem less than comfortable riding him .
    I guess they dropped the idea promoted on the Battle Cat box art where there was more than one of them and he became an individual character. If you look close Skeletor and Beast Man are riding them too. Of course, Skeletor got his own "custom" battle cat in Panthor.
    http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.ph...BadassPreacher

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